She Says She Hasn’t Heard Many Gunshots Lately

December 31st, 2022 – Post #63

Yesterday, my mom had an episode that seemed similar to the one she had in August.  She passed out and was unresponsive for about twenty minutes.   

She was pretty wiped out after that happened; but seems stronger today.  This morning, her first question to me was if I got enough sleep last night.

My slightly muddled response made her laugh, and she said, “You and I sure know how to live tired, don’t we?”  That cracked me up, thinking back to the nine mile mountain hike we took her on in El Paso, sometime too close to her seventieth year, when she commented mildly, “I’ve always lived tired.”  

Yes, we do have a tendency to overdo things in this family…

Anyway, we’re still tired tonight; but still trudging along. 😊

I think it was just this morning that she looked around and said, “Oh dear, what am I gonna do with my life – I’ve got so many cards I want to write.”  I guess that question never goes away – and no wonder she’s always lived tired.

After yesterday’s incident she was worried that she ought to be doing more to get checked; but has no desire to leave the house.  The Hospice nurse came over immediately upon hearing of the incident, and her Primary Care Doctor and Nurse Practitioner have also been updated on the situation, in case they have a differing viewpoint from the Hospice Doctor.  

Tonight she said, “I keep thinking I ought to have a cardiac catheter or something; but then I remember I’ve got Cancreatic Pancer!”

Right when she said it, she burst out laughing. Life’s a struggle; but she’s still laughing.

Almost every morning there are rainbows in the bathroom – this one reminded me that we have all God’s promises in our hands, and we are in His.  

Thank you for your prayers and encouragement.  Love, Jody 

P.S. I was just wrapping up this post when my mom was trying to put her shoes back on.  All of a sudden she announced (with a toothpick in her mouth, with a phrase she wouldn’t typically use), “It just sucks to have to die.  You just get the stuff you want, and you get it taken away.  And you just get your life where you want it, and then you have to die.”

Just now she said mildly, “Haven’t heard many gunshots lately.”

When that made me laugh out loud, she laughed too; but said, “What?  Well, it is the Fourth of July!” Then remembered it’s not – it’s New Year’s and only 9:03 PM.

If you want to see some funny videos from later that night, I highly recommend you moving your mouse over here and giving this a click. 🙂

*To read more on my mom’s cancer journey from the beginning, or share it, please click below:

It’s Cancer


I'm not sure what to say here: I once got second place in a dog-look-alike-contest? I know how to fold a fitted sheet? I'm pretty much a poster child for social backwardness - at least as far as social media is concerned; but I have some stories I think I'm supposed to share and am attempting to do that here, in this space.

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